Take it... It's YOURS!
We waste so much strength trying to steer storms we were never meant to command. But real momentum begins the moment we anchor into what's ours to move—right here, right now.
Every minute spent replaying a mistake or worrying about a future we can’t script is energy siphoned away from the one place our power actually lives…
The PRESENT
👉That’s where decisions get made.
👉That’s where growth happens.
👉That’s where change starts to stick.
When we stop outsourcing our attention to ghosts from the past... or fears of the future, something radical happens—we begin to reclaim the steering wheel.
And forward motion becomes inevitable.
(Read That Again) 👆👆
Craig Manning calls this out plainly in "The Fearless Mind."
Two of the most common places our energy leaks out?
Guilt and Fear.
And the reason they’re so draining is simple—they both fixate our attention on things we can’t change (the past) or can’t control (the future).
Let that sink in…
We’ve all been there.
😟A misstep in a relationship.
😟A missed opportunity.
😟Something you "should" have said.
😟That gut-punch moment you replay on loop.
But here’s the truth…
We already know when we mess up.
Instinctively.
Immediately.
If you’re even remotely self-aware (and you are if you're readin' my shiz)
... you don’t need to marinate in guilt for weeks to absorb the lesson.
If you stay present in the moment, you’ll catch the insight.
You’ll integrate it.
And you’ll keep moving.
But when we dwell?
When we obsess?
That ain't learning.
That’s self-punishment masquerading as self-improvement.
And it kills your mojo to take action "NOW!"
Same with fear.
When your mind races ahead to everything that MIGHT go wrong...
what you’ll lose,
who’ll judge you,
whether you’ll “fail”...
You’re not protecting yourself.
You’re handicapping yourself.
Your best decisions don’t come from panic about tomorrow.
They come from clarity today.
Let’s ground this in a story Manning shares about coaching tennis...
Imagine a player gives it their all—dives for balls, bloodied knees, full heart.
But they lose.
Now imagine their coach rips into them afterward.
Why?
Because they didn’t win.
But was winning under their control?
Not entirely.
The other player could have been more experienced, stronger, just had a better day.
So what’s the point of throwing blame to an outcome you can’t fully own?
It’s a trap we all fall into—coaches, parents, bosses, and worst of all, ourselves.
Holding ourselves accountable for outcomes rather than effort is the surest way to feel like a failure, even when we’ve shown up with everything we’ve got.
So what if we flipped it? 😉
The Constraint
What if the only thing we measured was what we can actually control—our focus, our effort, our preparation, our presence?
What if, instead of demanding perfection, we rewarded intentional execution?
This is where confidence lives. Not in guarantees of success, but in knowing you gave the moment everything you had.
That’s not naïve…
That’s powerful 💥
The Solution:
Because when you stop wasting energy on battles you can’t win, you unlock the fuel to win the ones that MATTER!
Let the past teach you, not trap you.
Let the future inspire you, not scare you.
Let the present be the only place you fight.
You don’t need to control the outcome to move the needle.
You just need to show up, fully.
Over and over again.
This is such an important reminder!
So often we give away our power without even realizing it to fear, to other people’s opinions, or to past mistakes.
I’ve experienced times in my life where I felt powerless, only to realize later it was my mindset holding me back. I love the idea of asking ourselves tough questions like, ‘Who am I giving my power to right now?’ or ‘What story am I believing that’s keeping me stuck?’
It really shifts the perspective. In my experience, taking back control starts with small, intentional decisions and setting boundaries both mentally and emotionally.
What are some ways you grab back your power when life gets heavy?
Absolutely love this reflection, AJ!
The way you phrased it: “Who am I giving my power to right now?”
That question alone has pulled me out of so many spirals.
And yes, most of the time the thief isn’t the world—it’s the story about the world we’re looping in our head.
The invisible contracts we signed without realizing.
The roles we assumed out of habit, not choice.
For me, grabbing back power starts with pausing long enough to notice.
Noticing where my attention is leaking… where I’m bending to please, performing, or proving.
Then I get brutally honest with myself.
Sometimes that honesty stings, but it always loosens the noose.
Little rituals help too, moving my body, naming the fear, deciding one small, true move I can make right now.
What you said about boundaries—mental and emotional—is so real.
It’s like gardening: weeding out what’s not ours to carry so what is can grow.
Keep asking the hard questions (and be honest with yourself).
They’re the keys.
Always in your corner
Dedo (Chief MEME Officer)
Wow, this really hit home. The way you broke down how guilt and fear rob us of our present power was such a wake-up call. I loved the tennis coach analogy reminded me how often I judge myself for outcomes beyond my control. It’s freeing to think that effort, not results, should be our focus. Curious—what helps you personally stay anchored in the present when fear starts creeping in?
Thank you, Kavitha!
I’m thrilled this resonated with you.
That shift from judging results to honoring effort is a game-changer, huh?
It’s MAD how much energy we waste on things outside our control…
…and how different life feels when we reclaim that power.
As for staying anchored.
When fear creeps in (and it does!), I remind myself that clarity lives in motion, not overthinking.
Even a tiny step forward, something I can control, snaps me back into the moment.
Also…
I try to catch the story my mind is spinning and ask: “Is this helping or hijacking?”
Most times, it’s the latter.
THAT little question is KEY to bringin’ me back to “reality.”
In essence, I ignore the “what ifs, “shoulds,” and crack on with the task at hand.
Simple, but not easy.
What about you—any personal anchors or rituals you lean on when the future noise gets loud?
In your corner
Dedo (Chief MEME Officer)